If I die before I wake
August 11, 2008 1 Comment
This is the latest in a series of essays titled “Man Has Premonition of Own Death”‘
Are you ever afraid of falling asleep? Does the thought cross your mind that this might be the night when you fall asleep and never awaken? Have you ever thought about what it means when someone says “He died in his sleep?”
Is it possible to die without waking up? Isn’t that sort of the ultimate alarm clock?
You’re sleeping and then your heart starts pounding crazily or a blood vessel explodes or a stroke jolts your brain. Wouldn’t that wake you up? Even if you died in a second, wouldn’t there be that one second when you shoot upright in your bed and see grinning Mister Death in his dark cloak and with his burning eyes and sharp scythe standing at the foot of your bed?
No, I don’t buy it. Those are comforting words – “He died in his sleep” – but I think it’s more likely that death is a rude awakening.
Is death a rude awakening? Or do the lights just go off, permanently? I shudder at either prospect, but the former bothers me much more than the latter. I would prefer to lose consciousness, period. I don’t want to wake up in another realm — another state of be-ing. What if, like Archy, I my soul awakens in the body of a cockroach?